5 Olympic Parade
Monologue written and performed by Layal Moukaddem
Hear From Outloud
Outro
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This is the end of Route B. If you would like to walk Route A and hear the rest of the stories, please go to the Pho Minh Temple and click here
Browse the tour
Route A
1) Pho Minh Temple | 2) Marion Street | 3) Bankstown Gospel Hall | 4) Bankstown Library | 5) Bankstown Library | 6) Paul Keating Park |
Route B
7) Bankstown Arts Centre – RS1 | 8) Amitabha Buddhist Association | 9) Bankstown Train Station | 10) My Dads Work | 11) Bankstown Centro | | 12) Bankstown Arts Centre – Gallery
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Transcript
Thoughts. They’re just thoughts. Then how come they don’t feel like my own?
The Bankstown arts centre’s art gallery, a passionate place.
What I know is I perceive her with resentment.
Resentment is like a friend you don’t want to be friends with, just lurking in the dark waiting to bite you in the bottom.
SFX: leaves blowing
Leaves blow but when someone comes to crunch them in their hands, it leaves a mark. Or does it?
Blowing leaves does not make me stop. Making me take 3 steps
forward and 2 steps back. With resilience it’s hard to reach, how fixed my mind can be. Fear exerts my body taking the first step into her best self. She’s always put together, never a flaw however touching her is a crime.
“I don’t know why i’m here”, I think as I step foot out of the car towards the censored doors.
Why is she so annoying?
What if I want to hangout with her just not all the time?
Dreading walking into the gallery I stifled a fixed mindset. Resentment sits underneath my bed and makes me panic when it’s gone. She’s scary. Terrified of my failure.
Say hili to the resentment,
“Leave me alone!” shrieked freedom.
“That wasn’t very nice” said resentment.
“Anyway, you can see his bulkiness through a dark blue bag full of his depressive state” whispered freedom.
Resentment holds my way of feeling confident but makes me quite the opposite.
“SHUT UP IT’S MY TURN.“
“Ok. My name is resentment. You feel me as soon as you step to ride the leopard…”
SFX: beating heart
At first it is like a beating heart is sustaining a beat of a drum, so much so I breathe heavily like I’m running away from a creepy man asking for my number.
Freedom is tall with layers of shelves reaching one third on the room. She’s located to the left of the space In front of my amazement.
SFX: leopard noise
The power the leopard holds seeking guidance from my intuition leaning on my spirituality.
As I stare astonished by my body fills with lazy bones.
Sometimes I question where I belong.
Is it a place close to my heart or far apart from the fact that I haven’t searched for it.
The Freedom of exploring my wilderness.
She steps into a life where dreams are a reality.
Where dreams can be heard. Canvases. Pieces all shapes and sizes.
She didn’t know the leopard could run.
What’s stopping her from running?
A dark cloud consumes the horizon of her gleams.
“What colour is it?” asked resentment.
“Green, the colours you see with your filthy eyes” freedom snarled.
The leopard couldn’t mention a word as he was trying to clamp a rat between his paws.
Stepping foot in this place is a magical thing.
Filling my mind with beautiful freedom.
“To hurt is to bleed resentment. “ He assures me, reminding me of my thoughts one more time.
“What if I don’t want to hurt anymore?”
My dream catches a smothering song of inspiration, playing in my head screaming
“I want,
I need
I must conquer these thoughts”
Drawing out my own gun makes me feel in power. A wash of vulnerability takes over me as I see myself hurt by my indespicable thoughts.
“Giving Up is given and must be loved”. Said resentment.
Opposing him is a must but conquering it is not easy. However, telling resentment to shut his mouth is the way to go but my want screams I wan\t to do more, telling my inner demons that my power is a blissful rhythm, so I’ve realised with widened eyes with absolutely no hesitation.
” it’s my turn”.
My turn to grow a see the light that shines on top of the hill crowded with dusky clouds. Hope is what this means? A smile spreads across my face. With excitement I seek refuge in my work.
Putting my head down, all the way home. I’m writing ideas that I view through a window of stars where I’m just a mere existence.
So, no resentment, I will never listen to you and the leopard will keep running.
SFX: leopard sounds / leopard running
